For some


For some, it’s due to my gender, being comfortable with my masculinity and loving being the man which Yeshua created me to be. For some, it’s due to the colour of my skin, being proud to be a straight Black man and a ‘certain kind of Black’ at that. For some, it’s due to me … Read more

The marriage series – Parenting


I’ve always had an issue with people who mention that they are not ready for the ‘marriage thing’, while being comfortable with having a child or more, sometimes with more than one partner.We really do live in a reverse (seemingly parallel universe) world, where those who could have children refuse, or can’t, for various reasons.While … Read more

The marriage series – Widowers and widows


As much as I didn’t see long-term relationships and marriages on my paternal or maternal side of my relatives.In my teens, I had a deep rooted desire to have a long-term relationship, which would ‘hopefully’ eventually turn into a marriage.I had 4 friendships/relationships which included 1 engagement, prior to starting my relationship with Lois.In an … Read more

The marriage series – Arranged marriage


Arranged marriage, those two words can provoke differing emotions, along with raised eyebrows.Depending on where you are in the world and your cultural background, arranged marriage can be looked at with a sense of excitement and expectancy or dread and disgust. If you haven’t already done so, please make some time to read the ‘It … Read more

The marriage series – Patriarchal naming


Identity means a lot to ‘most’ people.It’s ‘usually’ a given that most balanced, rational and relational people like to know where they are coming from and who the relatives are, in their biological ancestral paternal & maternal family lines. There is always something a little ‘different’ (sometimes positives, mostly negatives) about those who grew up … Read more

Unrestricted research


Search engines took over from the library (a place I would frequent often when I was younger) a long time ago.Thankfully, libraries will always have their place but rightly or wrongly, most people get their news and information via search engines on their e-devices and like it or not, their phones being the most frequently … Read more

The marriage series – Married, divorced and re-married


I love and prefer the interaction of dialogue but I will continue to do the ‘monologue thing’ if I have to.I could view the monologue post, as a type of newspaper column using a more formal format but I’ll save the more formal approach for my books and remain more personal on the Blog.As with … Read more

The marriage series – Polygamy


Welcome to the second post within the marriage series.Hopefully you’ve had time to do the pre-reading (“An extended introduction”, “Homosexuality… ” and “I’m sorry if”) and the first post, ‘What is marriage?’ which will keep all the posts in this series in context. What is Polygamy?Polygamy is an interesting topic which I’ve seen people tackle … Read more

The marriage series – What is marriage?


On the second of July, Lois and I reached our 28th year of marriage but have been together for 31 years.Back in 2012, when we were winding down our failing I.T. company and I was given the vision and inspiration to set up FSAC (For Singles And Couples).When I spoke to my dearly departed friend … Read more

The singles index


Most of the main posts for singles, are listed below. Obviously, these posts are not for all singles.There are many singles who have experienced and done everything and may have come to the conclusion that they either know everything, have no need to look at their single life from a different perspective and have no … Read more

The natural celibate (spiritual eunuch)

The natural celibate

A few months back a young woman tweeted that ‘marriage is not for everyone’.She was answered by a young guy who was in my network, who’s reply was ‘you’ve been lied to, it is for everyone’. So who was right?The short answer is, they are both right.Marriage is available for every male and female, however, … Read more

Friendship first


Greetings reader.I hope you are well. Lois and I recently watched an Amazon Prime show ‘The one who got away’.As with all these relationship reality TV shows, it was edited/scripted more for the entertainment value, rather than a sincere desire to assist the participants, with the relationship decision making process.Also, as with most contemporary TV … Read more